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Commentary: A man tweets a photo of a long, thin Amazon package jammed tightly under his doorknob. He says UPS delivered it. UPS says it didn't.

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UPS is the worst and their customer service is atrocious. So lemme explain why. First of all, two weeks ago, I was expecting a package and realized I should have gotten it.

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After immediately contacting the shipper to have them yell at UPS until they went back to delivering to the actual fucking delivery address something which took a further five days in all - I just got the package today and it was supposed to be delivered last ThursdayI figured I was done. No amount of absolving them of liability or begging them to leave it has any actual procedural effect. Which is horseshit.

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You stink. And not just any normal stink. Not like the stink I leave in the bathroom after a good bowl of chili with beans.

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Yes I walked on through the city and the night was closing in, I was looking for some action, didn't know where to begin My mood was really fire, I was as happy as can be, And all I needed was a girl to keep me company I walked into a pub where I found this maiden fair The minute that I looked at her there was something in the air Her deep blue eyes, her endlesss smile, her pretty face so sweet It was more than I could handle so I passed out at her feet Can someone tell me why Why the hell I cannot be Like all those guys I read about and see up on TV? I know I'm not a hero I got no self confidence. I think I'll just stop trying, cos I fuck up every chance. My parents kicked me out the door when I was 25 They said they wanted me to go and get a bloody life I got a job to pay the rent and a little place I found But somehow before seven weeks I'd burned it to the ground Now here I aam a glooming man, spending his last nights My boss had kicked me out, overslept too many times I wonder if I'll ever be the man I want to be Instead of this poor excuse for the man that you now see Can someone tell me why Why the hell I cannot be Like all those guys I read about and see up on TV?

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Via YouTube. Yes, this UPS delivery man not only fucked up the package, but then he added insult to injury by pissing all over it. Talk about a scorching douchebag.

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We all know there is something about UPS guys that make people, mostly women smile. Its a rush and quite frankly its a tease. Somehow that rush can turn sexual with the correct elements.

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