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And in the short amount of time between here and there, you have a limited amount of fucks to give. Very few, in fact. Which means you give a fuck.

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The sexual preferences of the fairer sex stretch far and wide, from the socially acceptable vanilla activities portrayed in Hollywood love stories to the dark and hidden desires only comfortably discussed in anonymous internet chat rooms. This endless variety means that anyone who claims to know exactly what every woman wants in bed is probably trying to sell you something, so I would never try. Look, I know you men have it difficult.

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